Dear James,
I hope you are very well. I send you and Sundari my gratitude for all that you do so generously and wish you both the very best for the New Year.
James: Yes, everything is copasetic. If it gets any better I don’t know how I will stand it.
I enjoyed reading your commentaries on the Mundaka Upanishad very much. Thank you so much for sending it! I love how the various scriptures and teachings allow me to understand Vedanta from different perspectives while conveying the same precious knowledge. The image comes to mind of a vacuum cleaner with all those different nozzles to remove dust and cobwebs from all the hard-to-reach places.
James: Yes, Vedanta is a complete teaching. It looks at the Self from every conceivable angle until you are completely convinced.
I still sometimes forget to discriminate and get caught up in worldly affairs. In fact, this jiva has taken on so many different activities in the past few months that it has become difficult to keep on top of all of them. I will do my best to sort things out, though.
James: Yes, rajas compels the jiva to do more than it needs to. It is painful because the jiva is actually unconsciously working against itself, which causes self doubt.
I am still wanting to improve my financial circumstances so that I will not be a burden to others in my more advanced years (part of the reason for my many activities is related to future professional opportunities). What seems to be coming to the fore now is being true to my svadharma, whether or not this earns as much income as I might hope.
James: Is there any evidence that you will be a burden to others later? Isn’t it as likely that you will be looked after in your old age as that you won’t? If you’re not satisfied with the way Isvara is looking after you now, then why will you be satisfied with the way you are looked after later? If you take a stand in your true self, the anxiety about the future disappears.
James: Perhaps you didn’t notice it, but there is quite a radical shift in perspective between the paragraph above and the preceding paragraph. The preceding paragraph was spoken from the Self’s perspective.. You said, “this jiva,” which implies that you are the Self because you see the jiva as an object. In the next paragraph, however, you speak as the jiva.
Lately, I have become more and more drawn to body-mind approaches and perhaps later will complement it with formal psychology training. Not because I think any of these things hold some definitive answer to life’s slings and arrows, but because I feel very strongly drawn to them (and have since my teens). And in my own case, I can see how everyday childhood traumas (you might call it karma? or samskaras?) can create negative beliefs that persist into adulthood and severely limit people’s thriving. Fortunately, brain plasticity means that this can be remedied at any age.
James: Ah yes, the tug of desire. This sounds like more rajas speaking. Yes, traumas are karma and since they are intense experiences they can easily develop into samskaras. But why would you want to formally study psychology to figure out how the adult you suffers negative beliefs? Negativity is experienced directly. Whenever you directly experience negativity it is supported by a negative belief. You don’t have one without the other.
The root negative belief is “I want this” or “I don’t want that.” It is born of an incorrect view of yourself as an inadequate entity. So how is the formal study of psychology going to help? At best it will tell you that low self esteem is not desirable, but you already know that. And it will not tell you not to try to improve yourself financially since everyone, including those plying the helping professions, is trying to improve their financial positions. Furthermore, if you don’t attack the root belief, the negativity caused by Self ignorance will just cook up another problem.
I know that one choice or another of path does not really matter; preferably, it is dharmic and is making a worthwhile contribution. The world needs all kinds to function.
James: Actually it does. If you are a committed inquirer, however, you don’t have a choice. You just follow the program. You do what you do in the karma yoga spirit, your life choices are determinized by whether or not freedom from habitual patterns is your goal, and you see that failure is as useful as success in terms of spiritual growth. Finally, you “formally” study Vedanta until thinking from the position of What You Really Are is second nature. .
The path you follow is dharmic if you are dharmic. You seem to be a very dharmic person to me, based on our previous chats. What does what the world needs have to do with you, Mary? You mean to say that the world needs people who are worried about their finances in their old age? I’d say the world probably doesn’t need any more people worrying about retirement since probably 99.99…% worry about it before and during old age. About the only time it stops is after old age.
In other words, although I am still interested in many things, my focus seems to be narrowing almost in spite of my (jiva)self to these body-mind approaches and writing. I have lost almost all interest in the other career-changing training I started (but I will continue and complete it as it can still be professionally useful and I don’t want to waste the money I’ve invested).
So the jiva’s fan is still turning a bit furiously, but I’m losing interest in speeding it up again.
James: Thanks be to God! Dare to trust, Mary. Be objective. Think of how bad life could be and count your blessings.
Excessive tamas, rather, is still a problem (for the jiva), but I am aware of it more than feeling submerged by it.
James: I hope you will forgive me for pointing out your tamasic thinking above. I should have read the whole letter and wouldn’t have felt so depressed on hearing about your plan to formally study psychology.
Creating sufficient rajas to move into action is still a challenge, though.
James: Just channel some of the prodigious rajas you already have into self inquiry and you will be a lot happier. You’re a spiritual person. Do what’s right for your spirit and the Lord will look after the needs of your body. The Gita says, “Fix your mind on the Self alone and it will look after your getting and keeping.” It’s a fact of life.
Anyway, even if the end-of-year update seems a little complicated for the jiva and I have compassion for my difficulties, underlying it all is a blessed simplicity and everything is fine with me. I look forward to seeing you, at least virtually, in the New Year!
James: Whew! It was worth waiting for the last paragraph!
Much love,
James
