Dear Ram-ji,
One sentence of last seminar continues to trigger:
The Self is defined as Sat Chid Ananda: Sat and Chid are ever obvious. And Ananda, Bliss is that “aspect” of the Self that makes the Jiva search for happiness.
From the perspective of the Self, Sat and Chid are equal to Bliss, whole, infinite and complete as it is. The Jiva, though ignorant, has no difficulties to recognise it exists and is conscious, but doesn’t realise that its never-ending search for fulfilment is due to the already ever present Ananda. Therefore, ignorant of its wholeness, it starts looking for bliss in the world and believes it will complete it.
Can we state that although Sat Chid and Ananda are nirguna, in maya Sat Chid Ananda are undergoing the influence of sattva, rajas and tamas, and especially Ananda stimulates the rather rajasic (burning) desire for moksha?
Ram: You can say that the satchitananda atma is apparently under the influence of the gunas, owing to its seeming association with the Subtle Body, which is the three gunas. Apparently means it isn’t under any influences. All influences are “under” it.
You can also say that the same ananda motivates the search of samsaris for experience-generated reflected bliss and it also motivates varying degrees of desire for liberation in spiritually-inclined individuals.
Well, while writing this, I realise that this applies to me (Mary), but maybe not to everyone.
Ram: Well, actually it doesn’t apply to Mary, unless the word Mary refers to the satchitananda atma. There is only one me. Your statement implies that the seeking Mary is conscious but “she” isn’t. She’s an It, an insentient idea incapable of seeking. Isvara is doing the seeking. The jiva never seeks because it is the satchitananda atma before, during and after the idea of seeking appears as an object within the scope of its panoramic awareness.
One’s desire for moksha may be sattvic or tamasic too… Obviously if the above makes sense, it clarifies all my past issues and conditionings, my rajasic behaviour and reaction every time joy was involved in life, it explains my insomnia since childhood, and it shows the path out of this wrong conditioning. I must have known and experienced since forever that I’m pure bliss but because of maya and rajoguna, I couldn’t handle “additional” material and universal joy. I already was the fire of joy but vasanas and samskaras made me continue to stimulate the burning desire for knowledge and life.
Ram: Yes, you always were pure bliss but maya made you think the bliss was in objects, in this case an event called moksa. There is no moksa because you were never bound.
And now, thanks to Isvara, Mary is “burned-out”, left with some nasty work of deprogramming wrong conditioning and habits, but totally convinced there is nothing to search for, and certainly no reason to set life on fire just because I’m bliss!
Ram: Yes, there is nothing to seek. But there is also no reason why you have to get rid of the bad habits unless you think they are real. Even then you can’t get rid of them because you can’t get rid of something that is real or unreal. If you stand as non-seeking awareness…the only me…they will fall off effortlessly. You needn’t carry the Mary idea forward. But if you do, then you can give the imaginary rajasic Mary entity the nasty job of cleaning up her imaginary mess. The mess is Isvara. Leave it to Isvara. You’re fine. Smell the roses, watch the grass grow.
I pray to Isvara to help me to dissolve the attachment to this useless intensity.
Ram: As long as you think you are Mary, then you need Isvara to make messes and clean them up. Let Isvara be Isvara. You’re the satchitananda atma. You are not a mess. You’re the knower of messes. When you accept that, the intensity will abate and you will cool down. Think of it as moving from the burning sunlight to the cool moonlight. Light is light, hot or cool.
To repeat. There was only a Mary because you thought there was a Mary. The gunas have no influence on you. It’s time to let the Mary thought go. From now on the word Mary points to you, the ever-present atma, as it always did.
Love and gratefulness for the non-ordinary teachings about this ordinary existence… 🙂
Om and Prem,
Your own Self
Dear Ram-ji,
Waw, this was a hard nut to crack! I feel like in a “bubble-shoot” game: You keep shooting on bubbles your whole life, and every time you hit a few vasana-bubbles, some new ones appear. But once you hit the Big Bubble, the one that has a name and a form and that appears to live in a world, then all the bubbles drop off together: the karma-bubble, the dharma-bubble, the punya/papa bubble, the moksha bubble, the body-bubble, the free-will bubble, the waking state-bubble, the sleeping-state bubble, the story-bubble… All gone! End of the game!
You’re so right to point this out, it’s time to stop thinking there is a Mary. Shoot off this one Big Bubble, so that the one and only Sat Chid Ananda remains as shining.
Thank you for the right shoot! You made an ace! 😉
Ram: It seems the empty bubble was full all along. Love you, Mary!!!
