Dear Beloved Sundari and Ramji
Without missing anything, I miss you a lot. How are you? I hope very much to meet you soon, in the coming Zoominar. With me everything is good! I live my simple life, spending most of the day alone (no work in winter, which is great!), a lot of beautiful nature, riding bicycle, read few pages every day from Vedanta Teaching by Ramji, listen to some Advaita Vedanta on You Tube… The mind loves to listen and hear Truth, every time new and fresh, thanks to the fact of knowing it in me as a Living Truth.
I still see the apparently specific jiva every day. I watch it without any judgment or trying to improve it. No frustration anymore. The only thing I try to do is not let vasanas that can create bad results work freely as they did before. I have tried to understand how this Jiva
Shankar, still exists while I know it is not essential, not True, while at the same time I really know Me as the unborn ever existing Self, Awareness, which is all, including the illusion of this Jiva that is happening in Me but cannot touch Me, affect Me or move Me whatsoever. I was waiting for this last identification to finally disappear.
Advaita Vedanta relates to this issue in the most scientific way. Sundari wrote me beautiful things about it last year. Ramji talks very clearly about this unique riddle as well. And what a strange absurd journey! A limited Jiva trying to know that he is not real, only apparently real, an appearance of Me, the Self. It is impossible but possible.
Maybe you remember the story of my brush with death when I was caught in a whirlpool in the Ganges. My air was finished and a blackness started to spread in my brain and I knew that Shankar was finished and then suddenly I am here, existing, completely safe, eternal, aware, not going anywhere. There is a beautiful word for this true eternal “state” in Hebrew, Hineni, which means : Here I Am, full and complete, eternal. Later on I found out that even this event, which happened 2 years after my Awakening to Who Am I, did not erase the possibility of identifying myself as a Shankar Jiva.
I am not waiting anymore for some last fall of this identity. I have a complete trust in Ishwara. Whatever needs to happen in its time is happening and everything is just perfect. I live with endless Gratitude all the time, no time. In fact, this Gratitude is my very Nature.
I hope so much that by Ishwara’s will, we will be able to join again in a physical seminar. Meanwhile, we have the internet.
Eternal Love and Gratitude,
Me, Shankar
Dear Shankar,
What a great gift, your email! I never tire of hearing the story of Isvara’s victories. We are so happy for you and feel blessed to know you. Yes, gratitude is the nature of all beings. It is freedom and love and truth and dharma all in One. Only one small little bit of guruing, if you don’t mind. You say you are a who but Ramji says Shankar is the who and you, The Eternal One, are a What! A small difference but no difference, like moonlight and sunlight. You can’t say they are the same but you can’t say they are different.
Much love,
Ramji
