Greetings Dear Ram.
It’s been over a year since I sent you a mail regarding my sex and money vasanas and how to deal with them after coming in contact with Vedanta through your book. Since then a lot has changed, I have studied other Vedantic texts such as Vivekachudamani and Tattva Bodha. I look back now and I see that my earlier view about sex and money was a very ignorant one due to lack of right understanding. By Vedantic reflection and inquiry, I can now see clearly that it is not actually because of money that I want money but because of the existential and emotional security that it falsely promises. I have also realized that the pleasure I enjoy in sex does not come from the other party but from my own self. My own light, reflecting in my mind, leaks out through the sense organs and then sensation happens. So all that I see, hear, touch, feel, taste and smell is my own self only. Nothing can be experienced outside myself. In ignorance, I had been fooling myself thinking that I was enjoying sex, whereas it was my own self that I had bn enjoying all along.
The false pleasure of sex and the apparent feeling of security, money promises, actually comes from within me but Maya makes it seem like it’s coming from external objects. I understand this clearly now and these two tendencies: sex and money, no longer have as much of a grip on me compared to before. Now I really do not care if I’m broke or if I have a million dollars. It changes nothing. Also, The innate tendency to chase after external objects, situations and People in search of fulfilment/security has declined greatly. Truly, in these times when spirituality has gone mainstream and everyone is talking about consciousness, the power of right knowledge cannot be overestimated and I cannot show enough appreciation for you and other Vedantic teachers because of whom this right knowledge/method of Vedanta, in its original form, is now available to all who genuinely thirst for truth. Thank you sir.
A lot has happened. I wouldn’t want to bore you with my spiritual experiences, I know you’d not be interested but I have to tell you that I’ve been witnessing nondual experiences, these experiences serve as valid proof that the difference between outer and inner is illusory. All my doubts about the teaching are cleared, I just need to keep working on my vasanas. Also, Ishwara has been proving to me that he hears my prayers, I had been praying to Ishwara for enlightenment since I read your book.
On 5th June this year, I felt a strange force descend down, from above my head and forced its way down my spine to my muladhara chakra and it entered my legs and filled my whole body with such indescribable calm. I’ve read people’s experiences of kundalini awakening from the base of their spine to the crown of their head, but the reverse has been my case. This force has been working in me since its decent. It keeps breaking and fixing me, sometime it’s very pleasant, other times, not so pleasant. I don’t even know what’s happening anymore, but my trust is firm in Ishwara and my faith in Vedanta is unshakable.
Please sir, if you will, you can be bless me. I humbly ask for your blessings for my spiritual growth. I understand that enlightenment does not come by efforts alone but by grace. I need your grace as the guru. Shine thy light through me I beg thee. I attach my photo for that purpose only. Thank you.
Yours faithfully
James: Of course you have my blessings Dan, but it seems you blessed yourself by sticking with the teaching. The attention a person puts into self inquiry sometimes causes Isvara to teach jiva in this dramatic way. One shouldn’t ask for this kind of experience as it is never known if it will have a beneficial or a detrimental effect. These dramatic demonstrations of Isvara’s power tend to cause more trouble than they are worth. Usually the jiva concludes that it is particularly special, becomes conceited, thinks it doesn’t need a teacher and an impersonal teaching and sets out to confuse others. You are lucky to have avoided that trap. The appropriate response is humility born of awe.
When I first came to Vedanta my faith in scripture wasn’t strong enough so Isvara sent the shakti down in such a way that it left no doubt about the meaning of the words. I didn’t need that kind of experience again because I realized that what the scripture says…that what happens is out of the control of the jiva...is literally true. Isvara controls everything from the most minute material and sentient entities to the movement of the whole cosmos. Experience is a decaying time capsule meant to deliver knowledge.
Much love,
James
