Maria: This time I’m texting you to share I feel lost. I feel I’m forcing the machine, the physical body, not allowing Isvara’s will after more weeks at the hospital trying new treatments, now facing a hard bacteria so I decided to go back home, stop all treatments, and wait till Isvara calls this jiva.
I shut down all other communications because I don’t feel like talking to anyone till now with you. How I wish to be able for a Mahasamadhi… I need your wisdom, I can’t with tamas, and I know I’m not that but how to manage this loop of pain. The body is not responding, I’m tired. Please help, I’m afraid.
Sundari: I am so sad to hear about this. I can really understand it must be so hard to be in this body with what you are going through, and that it is causing a lot of suffering and fear for your family, too. Stop fighting, it is exhausting you.
I think you have made the right choice to let go and let God. Allow Isvara to either heal or take the body. Do not be afraid. While a mahasamadhi is always wonderful, it is just another experience that will end, just like life does for all of us. In the body You do not need it. You are the knower of all experiences.
You know that you do not die, only the body dies. The body knows how to live and how to die because it belongs to Isvara, and it is on loan to us. ‘We’ as a jiva die every night when we go to sleep. All the same, I know it is very hard for the person to think of the end when we must let go of those we love. Life is a beautiful dream. But it is a dream.
As you know, this must happen at some point, for everyone. If not today, tomorrow. One, twenty, thirty, forty years – what difference does it make, actually? None, to you as the Self. And for Maria – she has had, and still has, a wonderful life. You have given and received so much love, you have a beautiful family. Most important, you have realized the purpose of your life, the highest purpose there is. You have realized the Self. Be happy.
It is good to always have our ‘suitcase packed’ for the jiva. Those who love us in this form will be very sad for some time, but we must all face letting go of the body, as well as losing and letting go of others we love in the body. All things mithya must pass. And you as the Self are here to see them coming and passing.
When we surrender like this to Isvara, who knows what miracles are in store? Trust that Isvara knows and has your destiny as Maria taken care of, either way. If it is not your time, Maria will not leave this body, and we will have the joy of your presence with us for longer. But if it is your time, there is no avoiding it. What are you afraid of?
Maria: How I wish to be well but not like this… besides there is tension with my beloved family and I feel so sad. It has been so long… I can’t avoid suffering. I left the hospital yesterday and flying back home on Wednesday, no more treatments. All my love and gratitude to you and Ramji.
Sundari: With surrender and acceptance will come the sattva which will allow you to heal the strain with your family and calm their fears, too. Feel the sadness, the emotional pain of loss, but do not give in to it.
Remember that You are the Self. Unborn, undying, ever present, and unchangeable. And so are those you love. Sing the song of the Self, if not out loud, in your mind. Know that you are held in it and are safe, always and all ways. Keep the altar fire burning.
I am always here for you if you want to talk, or for me to send you a voice message via WhatsApp.
We hold you deeply in love and light
Sundari
