Anne: What is interesting is that over these past months I have been observing and thinking about what it truly means to surrender one’s whole existence as a jiva to Isvara, knowing that I am the Self and this jiva is nothing but an apparent embodiment of Isvara or Existence shining as Consciousness. The attitude of amor fati is at the heart of this because surrendering means full acceptance that everything that apparently transpires, good and bad, is absolutely perfect and is an expression of the love that is my nature (appearances to the contrary notwithstanding!)
When this attitude of amor fati is embraced wholeheartedly, with NO exceptions, it confers enormous freedom from the idea of doership, and yet paradoxically does not remove free will (or saying no to Isvara). The focus is on the Shining Self that is pure love, untouched by anything, and not on what ‘happens’ to the jiva’s mind/body. I write this to you, knowing that there are some days when love flows so freely, so unstoppably and other days where sadhana is indispensable for a peaceful mind. I believe Swami Dayananda said that there is no need to plan anything as the prarabdha is always just slightly ahead, rolling out in front of your life and all you need to do is follow faithfully (or words to that effect).
Sundari: What beautiful and elegant writing. Writing as the Self has such an unmistakable resonance to it. Your description of what it takes to live Amor Fati is perfection – right down to the fact that some days are golden, and some are not. Life is life. Knowing you are the Self does not change that, only how we relate to it. Self-knowledge transforms everything when we live as the embodiment of Consciousness/Isvara.
As Swami D put so succinctly, our prarabdha karma is always a few steps ahead of us, so why worry about anything. The truth is even though there is no karma for us as the Self, we cannot make something happen nor escape our karma as the jiva. What’s in the pipeline is going to find us, what’s not meant for us never will find us. When we are totally attuned to and one with life, Isvara, we get a very strong sense of what’s leaving and coming our way. I have had some very powerful insights like that recently in my life. But as karma yoga is the automatic response, it is not my concern, one way or the other. Che sera, sera, as the song goes. There is no need to change anything, though change always comes. How freeing to hand it all over to Isvara, as you say.
I just marvel at the silky smoothness of Isvara’s magic carpet when we lie back and surrender to wherever it is taking us, even when we have plans for or insights into the future. I posted a little poem about this on my FB this week. Loving as Love.
Here it is
Mi Amor
I am
The spectator of my fate
Amor fati
The lover and beloved
All ways One
Always still, holding
Unchanging
The witness of all that comes
And goes
That which stays
Is me
Mi Amor
How exquisite it is to love
As love
Sundari
